Wednesday, January 26, 2011
A few things...
1. See these beautiful girls?
First, they have grown up and it makes me feel so old. Aren't they beautiful?
Most of all, I'm so thankful for them.
My mom does a lot of the care for my babies, but my sisters do a ton, as well.
The girls love their aunties and want to grow up to be just like them.
I'm so glad they have such great role models.
And... Karis is learning things like tying her shoes, fancy hair dues, things I want to do for her but can't at the moment.
Her whole reason to learn to tie her shoes is so she can learn to knit - a stipulation from her aunties.
2.All your life you are told several things.
Only eat when you are hungry.
Stop when you are full.
Never stuff yourself.
Over the last week I can only think of about three times I've eaten when I've been hungry.
I never stop when I'm full.
I always stuff myself.
They say that it only takes, what, 21 days to form a habit?
What if at the end of this weight gain I can't stop? :-)
I wrote the above several days ago and I'm happy to say my stomach is stretching and I'm getting hungrier.
3. Overall things are very encouraging around here.
I'm coughing less.
When I do cough, and it is still often, it is to get up Phlegm.
I read books to my girls the last couple of nights with barely a cough.
Do you know how long it has been since I've done that?
A long, long, long, long, long time.
Dr. Moffett said to look for gray, brown, and most of all black Phlegm.
I've seen a lot of gray and brown.
Sorry to gross you out, but I know you want to know the positive about this cancer thing, and right now Phlegm is positive.
About a week ago I actually coughed up some black.
I was shocked.
It wasn't big.
Little flecks, but black.
According to my doctor it is a sign my tumor is breaking up and parts are coming up.
I told him last time about how disappointed I was by the small amounts of icky colored phlegm I was coughing up.
That indulgent smile that doctors get when patients are worried needlessly. I know the look well by now. :-)
Then told me that probably most of the tumor will dissolve without coming up.
I should just be happy with the signs that it finally might be dissolving.
I say might because we don't know anything for sure.
It could just be a fluke, but I'm praying so very hard that it isn't.
I'm praying this long journey is coming to a end.
My goals are this.
Cough up and dissolve tumor.
Not hard, right?
Not with all your prayers.
Nothing is impossible with God!