Tuesday, September 21, 2010

It's all a waiting game.

Yet another thing I'm learning about myself.

It is so hard to wait.

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." Phil. 4:6

I quoted that for me just now.

Not because the news I got today was bad.

But because it was another wait and see.

The MRI images were in.

To my oncologist they look like cysts on my liver, not carcinoid.

So Dustin and I asked him what we needed to do? How do we tell?

We wait.

We wait to see what the radiologist says in three days.

We have another MRI in three months.

Which, just so you know, three months puts us at December 21st.

I was more shocked by that fact than anything else.

Christmas is in three months.

My scheduling lady wished us a Happy Thanksgiving, as we walked out.

AAUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!! I need to Christmas shop!

But you clearly aren't reading this to hear me freak out about Christmas.

Nope, you want to know the details of my liver. :-)

Isn't life funny?

I'm all concerned about my lung.

My doctor wants to know about my liver. We didn't even look at my lung. We won't until three months from now when I have a chest x-ray.

Why is the liver so important?

If I don't have carcinoid in my liver than we might be able to do something about my lung.

Possibly surgery.

Possibly something else. I don't know what the something else is, however, so when I do find out I'll let you know. He just mentioned something else, so I though I'd throw it in there. He probably said what it was, but it was technical.

I got a tad distracted when he mentioned that I should consider bowls of ice cream to gain some weight. What? Ice cream? My doctor says I can have ice cream? I wanted to run to Dairy Queen right then. I won't, but I do have to gain weight, but I'll post about that later, maybe. Anyhow....

Now we wait. And I work on not being anxious. And on resting in the Lord. Trusting He knows what is going on and that I don't need to worry about a thing.

Life is all about waiting.

I know this.

In the past it's been waiting to graduate.

Waiting for a trip to come.

Waiting to meet the love of my life.

Waiting to get married.

Waiting for that first baby.

Now it is waiting for the results of a test.

For the blood work to come in.

To see if my liver has cysts on it or carcinoid.

And that kind of waiting is a bit harder for me.

Maybe it is because my life can't quite go on as normal because my health won't allow it.

The wait seems longer, the end results not engagement rings, wedding dresses, and soft baby snuggles.

But... God tells us to give thanks in everything, so today I'm giving thanks that...

18. My blood work remains normal.

19. I probably don't have carcinoid in my liver.

20. For a doctor who is both cautious and proactive.

21. That I didn't have to tackle a hospital gown today.

22. For thunderstorms. I love thunderstorms.

23. For a warm, dry house.

24. Naps, one of which I'm going to take right about now.

25. A God I can trust no matter what.

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