Sunday, July 26, 2009

I want...

I just want everyone to know I slept seven straight hours last night. I know it doesn't seem like much to some of you, but for me it is a mini miracle. I don't think that has happened since Gabi was born and my health got so yucky.

On the health side of things, I'm feeling pretty good. I have a bad cold or maybe it is allergies again, I can't tell, but my lung feels great. I still wheeze when i take a deep breath, but it's not burning or causing my head to ache, so that makes me happy. On the downside, my cough is worse, but again, I don't know if that is because of the cold/allergies, or what. I go to the doctor on the 28th, so just pray that he will have direction for me. I want so badly to feel normal again. To have the energy to clean my ENTIRE house in a day, which isn't that much as those of you who have been here know. :-) I want to be able to wash all my laundry and not leave it sitting in baskets for a week because I'm exhausted. I want to cook nice meals for my family and not just put something in their mouths so they don't starve. I want to play with my girls and have energy to keep up with them. But once again, even though these things sound noble, it is the case of the "I wants..." Really, when it all comes down to it, I want what God wants for me. If I am supposed to deal with this for however long I want the strength and the grace to survive each day, bringing glory to Him. That is what I want. Really, even if I have to sound like I'm going to hack my lung up at any moment and people look sideways at me wondering why on earth I am out infecting them with whatever horrible disease I have spewing out of my mouth. I really should start wearing a sign. :-)

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